I have not blogged for over 3 months because my life has been mentally hectic. Today I am making the time to do it (even though I would prefer sleeping) because it's 11-11-11. Technically because I am posting this at 12:52A it's already passed the auspicious date but in my world the new day does not start until I have gone to bed.
I am just going to throw this out there and it ain't gonna be pretty... anyone else out there feel like the world is off it's rotation? If you know me, you should know that I am a very positive person, cynical yes, but I see the world as my oyster and the glass is always full. Since the middle of last year I have been struggling to beam rays of sunshine from this Care Bear. Not sure why. I started noticing this and dismissed it as possibly the economic downturn, perhaps it's old age and I'm just crabby or even a bit of the post baby blues from juggling a baby, a toddler and a new business. Then I started to be aware of the people around me. Friends and family were are all entering major shifts in their lives. We're not talking changing underwear here or trying out a new recipe. People were changing careers, questioning long time relationships, uprooting their families and moving. And these were just some of the more stable friends.
Personally I have been feeling anxious. I don't normally feel anxious so I didn't realize it was anxiety until someone close to me was clinically labelled with depression. After observing the behaviors I recognized this odd feeling as "anxiety." I am a person that thrives in chaos. Ask any former manager of mine, and they will report that my true colors show when I am plunked right in the middle of mayhem. The adrenaline starts pumping and instinct takes over. I am sure a junkie goes through this same high. Nope... this is definitely not a natural "Huong" emotion and I am highly uncomfortable with it. When something like this happens I kind of withdraw, start being introspective and just observe... I quietly gather my thoughts, assimilate information, formulate questions, seek answers and methodically apply trial and error hypothesis.
Well here are some interesting observations I have molded, digested and now spitting out for trial. I know I must attract a different sort of energy and I am able to perceive other people's energy. You may label this as an intuitive or clairvoyant. All my life I just assumed I was a good people reader. If you're following my blog I would have to assume you have met me in the flesh thus you have been subjected to my witty banters (well they are witty in my head). Would you not agree that I am a good reader of your character, that I understand your core and that somehow I created a connection with you that seemed to have transcended time even though our relationship has not been cultivated for that long? I have been told that I have. Up until a couple months ago I just thought I was a good people reader but it has been brought to my attention from another intuitive that I have a gift of reading your energy level that normally is not visible. I "get" people and that's why I have been successful (so far) in my life. Apparently I translate energy vibrations so I intuitively know who to surround myself with, who to avoid and why you behave the way you do. A random intuitive in a mall recently told me this but I won't digress from my point of topic (but will reserve it for a future one)! And all this time I just thought I was super smart... nope, I just know how to read you and act accordingly to that in my favor. It all makes sense now why I always knew who the liars, frauds, and scums of the earths were.
Second strange epiphany is that I have been plagued with headaches all my life. Ask my mom, she bought Costco sized Tylenol and Advil because I popped them like Skittles growing up. I have been told by another person that I am "sensitive" to the Earth's vibration. Again, another random psychic told me this when I was in my store and again, I will expand on this in a future blog. I suspected this because every time there was a low pressure system brewing my migraines kicked into overdrive. I also noticed that when there was some kind of weather disaster like the last earthquake we had I would wake up feeling like the effin ugly bus hit me.
So, here's my hypothesis. Something is truly broken with the world we are currently living in. For those of us that are sensitive to this, we are uncomfortable with the current vibrations so we're making huge life changes in an attempt to find our normal "groove." I think I lost my groove. Or perhaps I never had it but my current normal feels abnormal so I am seeking something... an explanation... something calming... something fulfilling... something that gives more meaning to the chaos.
I closed the store today to remember 11-11-11. I was able to just hang out in my pyjamas, clean up my nest and stare in awe at my babies and how fast they have grown. Perhaps staying in the moment keeps you sane from the chaos. And perhaps all those years of popping the pills to dull the senses on my uber sensitive antennaes was an act of self preservation because ever since I had kids, the channels seem to be receiving too much information.
